Tuesday, 23 June 2015

Person in Video 1.7: description



This was an exercise in making a character have some conflicting characteristics. I was trying to make the guy on the bus have two sides, but I think I accidentally told more about the narrator - must think about that as it seems useful...

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   I was sitting on the bus yesterday, just going to the park to feed the ducks, when I noticed an odd person in the seat in front. His hair, which was almost as grey as mine, was long and dragged back into a rough pony tail. I could also see a bit of his cheek with some scruffy, dark stubble; his shoulders were heavy and broad.
   He wore a camouflage jacket, like some kind of urban soldier. I wondered if he was one of those football hooligans. Perhaps he was dangerous - he was much bigger than me. I was watching out for any sort of threat from him... suddenly I realised my stop had come, so I got up in a hurry to get off the bus.
   I tripped and dropped the bag containing the ducks’ bread right in the gangway beside his seat. He looked down at the bag, then turned to look at me and immediately jumped up.
   He was much younger than I had guessed, even scruffier from the front as he was wearing a torn black tee-shirt under that jacket. But he had a beautiful smile. He tapped the bell to warn the bus-driver that I was getting off and picked up my bag for me.
   ‘Here you are!’ he said, and I realised that he was probably young enough to be my grandson. But why was his hair so grey?
   He must have seen me looking at his hair, because  he gave a slight nod and added in a softer voice, ‘It’s been growing out grey ever since I was caught in a fire when I was twelve.’ Before I could apologise for gawping like that, he patted me gently on the shoulder and helped me off the bus.

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